Mindfulness can be defined as the psychological process of purposely bringing one’s attention to experiences occurring in the present moment without judgement. Being mindful involves curiosity and neutral observation to gain insight on the nuances of YOU! Practicing mindfulness highlights our tendencies, behaviors, patterns, expectations, responses, reactions and coping strategies. Mindfulness is a tool we can use to become aware of our patterns for thinking and behaving. When you are unaware of your thoughts and behaviors you live on autopilot, and you think and do based on how it has always been even when it’s not ideal for the current situations. When these characteristics are recognized then we can evaluate what is working well and what needs an upgrade.
Mind-Bodyfulness
While the term is mindfulness, I believe it would be more accurate to say Mind-bodyfulness although that doesn’t roll off the tongue as easily, does it? What happens in the mind affects the body and what happens in the body affects the mind. They really operate together and can not be separated.
There are 4 components to hone in on with regard to mindfulness. Cultivating awareness in the mind-body includes paying attention to thoughts, attention, awareness and choice.
Mindful Thoughts
Firstly, let’s look at thoughts. Are your thoughts helpful or unhelpful? Healthy or unhealthy? True or speculation? Manageable or racing? Did you know we have between 50,000-70,000 thoughts per day?! Sadly, a majority of those thoughts are spent in worry, regret, remorse or other stressors. Many times, we get stuck in our head about things that happened in the past or worry about things that may happen in the future. Focusing on the past invites ruminating thoughts to take over wishing things would have gone differently. Going into the future can lead to worst case scenarios that cause anxiety. Mindfulness is intentionally bringing attention back to the present moment.
Mindful Attention
Secondly, it is important to know what has our attention. What thoughts and feelings take up a majority of our time? Are you able to focus on a single thought or are there many thoughts that cause overwhelm or distraction?For me, it often feels like my brain is like a window on the computer with too many tabs open at the same time. I jump back and forth between all the tabs not able to really focus on any single one of them. In fact, I just checked my browser and right now I have 7 tabs open! Spending too much time planning, problem-solving, daydreaming, thinking negative or random thoughts can drain your energy and distract you from what is right in front of you.
Mindful Body Awareness
Thirdly, we shift into the body and pay attention to body awareness. Are you able to sense what is going on inside and outside of your body? Do you listen to the body when it speaks to you? Are you able to notice hunger cues, thirst, when stress is rising or when you are angry? When I started really paying attention to my body sensations, I noticed how often my jaw was clenched. Now that I am aware of my tendency to store anger and other emotions in my jaw, I intentionally drop my jaw during the day when I notice it.
Noticing in the Body
The very act of noticing what is happening on the body can be calming. This is because our body has internal rhythms that help us relax if we give it a chance. One way to really help with body awareness and relaxation is through the healing practice of Reiki. I wrote an article about the benefits of Reiki here .
Noticing when we feel our emotions as sensations in our body, such as the lump in your throat when you hold back tears, the heaviness in the chest that comes with sadness, or the clenched fists and jaw that come with anger is the first step. When we notice we can name the emotion and allow it to flow through us in order to be released.
Mindful Choice
Finally, the last component of mindfulness is choice. Are you able to see your ability to choose what to do and how to respond to a situation? Or do you tend to instinctively react to a situation and wonder what just happened afterwards? With mindfulness there is space to pause and choose as opposed to reacting out of emotional outburst or instinct. Whenever we have choice and select our behaviors we are in a state of self-empowerment.
Non-Judgement
Another important concept of mindfulness is non-judgement. This refers to allowing whatever is noticed to be present without trying to escape the physical sensations and also without the harsh critical voice being a big meanie in your mind.
Mindfulness Example
For example, imagine giving a presentation in front of a roomful of people. Halfway through you completely blank and start to feel really embarrassed. Then you notice your cheeks getting hot as you fumble through your papers. You look up to see the people just staring at you waiting for you to speak.
Being judgmental with yourself, aka, hearing a mouthful from your inner critic, would sound like this: “What is the matter with you? This is so embarrassing. They must think I am such an idiot. I don’t belong here. Why can’t I just be good enough?” Ouch. Unfortunately, many people are intimate with their inner critic who loves to berate and induce shame.
In this example, non-judgement, on the other hand, would sound more like this: “Oh, I am feeling embarrassed right now. I recognize the discomfort I am experiencing -my cheeks are getting warm and I sense shame in my abdomen. This will not last, I will take a deep breath and regain composure.” When practicing mindfulness and non-judgement, there is an absence of harsh negative self-talk about the situation, thoughts, feelings, and actions of yourself or the others in the room. You simply acknowledge the experience in the moment, albeit an uncomfortable situation, knowing it won’t last forever.
Mindfulness Basics
- Mindfulness doesn’t require a belief system. Being mindful can be seen and certainly experienced as a spiritual practice. However, a lot of science and research have shown the benefits of mindfulness as well.
- Mindfulness is not an experience to achieve, it’s a training or practice in being present and non-judgmental. This means, don’t expect something amazing to happen when you set an intention to be mindful and be hard on yourself if it doesn’t feel amazing. In the beginning it may be hard, like most new things. Read more about being new at things here. The main point is- if mindfulness doesn’t feel amazing on day one it does not mean you are doing it wrong!
- Mindfulness doesn’t guarantee relaxation. In fact, mindfulness can be uncomfortable initially as you go off of default mode and begin to notice your body sensations, emotions, and thoughts. Over time, you may begin to notice you have a higher tolerance for uncomfortable situations or you are able to calm down more quickly after a stressful situation. The changes may be subtle. Sometimes it is other people in your life who you spend time with who notice something different in you before you realize the change in yourself.
- Mindfulness is not about trying to ‘clear the mind.’ Remember how many thoughts we have per day!? The goal is to soften the resistance to the discomfort you feel. In addition, mindfulness is about observing thoughts, feelings, and emotions in a non-judgmental way and re-directing attention back to the here and now when you realize you are distracted.
Conclusion
In conclusion, mindfulness is the basic human ability to be fully present, aware of our thoughts, attention, body awareness, and the ability to choose without being overly reactive or overwhelmed by our moment-to-moment experiences. While it may seem impossible to get to this state, it is something that humans are capable of with practice.
More on the benefits and how-to cultivate mindfulness coming soon!